Hey 'dad' come up with a better answer - and faster next time! You're making me look bad.

As he's bumbling for the words, trying to come up with some pseudo answer to not break her heart - he actually does... Cuz by taking that half second or two, he's said all he needs to, indicating to her that she's really a second class kid to him cuz she isn't a boy. He's insulting himself, and other dads that are more than happy to have girls! And I'm a little pissed at McCrappy's for even putting a commercial like that out there - not that they're going to lose much business from me.

My friends say it's karma exacting some measure of revenge on me for not being a little angel when I was younger... but having these kids has changed my life completely, and having all girls has given me a very different perspective. I'm not saying that I don't want to be traveling 85% of the time again when they're all teenagers, but at the same time - I get to learn new things, and not have to try to live my life vicariously through a son, pressuring him to do the things I never got to do... and I'm not going to be forcing any of the girls to be my 'designated boy'. Not that there's anything wrong with boys - we had a name picked out from the beginning - just never got to use it, and I wasn't going to have FOUR girls ...

And just because they're girls - doesn't mean they have to be princesses or DIVAS (hate that word). My girls get in there, get their hands dirty when they need too. They love to help me out with whatever I'm doing - gardening, fixing the car, working on the rec room...etc They like biking, canoeing, skiing and camping - just like I do, so what's the problem? I guess for big hockey/football/baseball guys - their dreams for producing the next franchise player isn't going to happen - so maybe that's where that McD's dad stumbles for a second...

Of course, my girls are in Dance, and yes - dress like little princesses/divas while on stage - and this weekend they're back at competition. Emma had her first solo this morning, after being selected very late in the season to get a solo - she's learned her entire routine in little over 2 weeks! She did great - so proud that she made it all the way through very well, and ended up with a great score!

Of course that's not true - there are tons of great dads out there that will do anything for their daughters - just watch So You Think You Can Dance. There was one dad last night whose chin was bouncing all over the place - trying to fight off the tears! (now that was funny)

However, there are a few things that I probably would not have done in my life had I been the father to 3 boys, instead of 3 girls - like being in the 'Daddy Synchronized Swim' for Rebekah's team when she was younger (yes - we looked EXACTLY like that SNL skit with Martin Short...). And I definitely would not be doing what I will for the first time this weekend - at a competition no less - being part of the parents dance number!

Here's a small hint as to what I'll look like come sunday...

But there's nothing wrong a little fun, and it's a challenge just like any other, and if you're not challenging yourself and having fun - what are you doing?

Known to most as the May two-four weekend, I had to check up on the actual relevance of the day after the girls asked... figured it had to do with the former queen (why we celebrate this I have no idea), turns out it's for the former Queen (Victoria) and the current Queen. Yiippee.

It's always been the first weekend to start planting gardens and/or prepping the cottage and/or going camping for the first time of the year. Typically it falls around May 24th, and the two-four is for the case of beer that is usually consumed during the weekend. (per person or is that just me and my friends?)

We did gardening - check out the makeover!

The girls love planting vegetables, so we went out shopping at the local nursery (which they thought was going to be some baby place). We picked out some tomato plants, cherry tomato plants, cucumbers, pickling cucumbers, beans - and some hops! Was told by a friend that hops grow great up here, and I make beer - so maybe I'll be able to use them...

My neighbour came over and pointed out that the garden was 4 inches beyond the property line. I had simply extended what the previous owner had put in, and thought nothing of it. For some reason, he HAD to have this land back.

Now along the side of his house, he's planting a garden that goes all the way to the edge of my propery line, and every time his kids (or unlicensed daycare kids) run-by, they run through our garden! I'm TRYING to be the good Canadian and turn the other cheek... (don't salt his garden - don't salt his garden...) but now I'll have to put something up to stop that.

Isn't it fun living in the burbs?

Not like I have much of a choice Having 3 girls pretty much paints me into a corner. Yes it's absolutely true that girls play hockey, but we haven't always been here and dance was something they were always able to do - and loved.

This past weekend, we had our first road trip competition of the season to Peterborough. Meghan is in full on with competitions this year. Last year she had one dance number that she competed in with the group, this year she has seven! Five group numbers and two solos. Needless to say, it's been pretty busy for her during the week going to all the practices and private lessons...etc, etc... Her dance school, Elite, is really very good. They work the kids hard to make them the best they can be (no they're not the army).

Meghan was scheduled to dance five of those numbers on Friday, so last Thursday evening, we packed up her seven tiny little shiny outfits, her sister, a cooler full of food and snacks and headed down highway 7 to Peterborough. I'd like to mention that this has to be the worst drive ever! It's three hours of 80 km/h!!! You heard me, 80. That's like going down some boulevards in the city. And I can hear it now - cmon, 80 is just a suggestion... more like a minimum... Well, first of all - I had no idea it was 80 all the way. I had assumed that it was 90 like most country highways. I was driving my typical 15km/h (or so) over the limit and in the middle of nowhere, passed a cop going the other way. He nailed me for doing 107 in an 80. It was actually pretty funny. I hadn't been pulled over in a looooooong time. Not that I don't speed - I just don't get caught (well, other than the photo radars in Germany...). The officer asked when I had been pulled over for speeding last - I told him I couldn't remember. Honestly, I couldn't - think it was at least 15 years ago... (He didn't need to know about me - legally - going 220+ on the autobahn) He went back to his car, did his thing slowing me down for 10 minutes - then came back with a reduced ticket. He told me to drive 95km/h and no one would pull me over. Ok - done, so our 3 hour cruise turned into 3.5 hours...

Horrible drive aside, we managed to roll into the hotel around 9 and went to bed. Meghan had a lot of dancing to do the next day, and we wanted to make sure she got her rest. It didn't help that someone was insisting on remodeling upstairs and was drilling away - at 10pm - REALLY?!? Luckily Meghan had already fallen asleep - but the rest of us struggled through the night. I would have called down, but didn't want to chance waking her up.

Friday was crazy. One of my many jobs as a dance dad, was to stay the hell out of the way, but the other was to be the mule. That meant getting the cooler ready for the day, pack up the car as things were ready, get the coffee/donuts and then drive them down to the theater (then take the car back to the hotel and walk back to the theater to avoid parking hastles!). Sara had to prep Meghan, get the hair and makeup done, get all the days costumes and hairpieces together and know the schedule so she knew what she had to do and when.

Obviously my responsibilities were far greater ;-)

Apparently - because that song was played almost every other routine... the other song getting the most play? Rednex - Cotton Eye Joe. Yeehaw, special torture! Since the day was primarily for the wee ones, under 12, there was plenty of 'cutesy, pukey' music.

From about 9am until 9pm that night kids were paraded out in glittery costumes, tons of makeup and boomp-tick-boomp-tick music. Every 2.5 minutes. It gets to the point where you're relieved to here classical music for ballet routines! Sitting in a dark theater, for hours on end, on seats that might have been comfortable for the first 30 minutes - was kind of like flying to China.

Luckily, Meghan or one of the Elite members were dancing every hour or so that day, so I had something to look forward to. But still it made for a looooooong day.
Meghan did amazing. She placed 1st in both of her solos, and her team routines all received diamond awards (highest level). Here are a couple of shots from her solos...

Day 2 - The surly teamster

Saturday was my big day. I was signed up to help with the set for some of the big numbers. It was a bit of a relief to know that I wouldn't have to be sitting all day... I had gone through the process of the stage setup once before for dress rehearsal, and knew that the pieces were big and heavy. They basically had a stair builder create a huge platform for them - but it was way overkill. Massive 2x10 joists on 12 inch centers with 5/8inch plywood on top - they were better built than 99% of Kanata homes!!! So we hauled these huge pieces out of the trailer and waited for a break to bring them in and set them up. There was a collection of about 8 dance dads there, other poor souls relegated to being mules and now teamsters like me... but are all great sports about it.

We got the break and pulled all these things on stage and hooked it up. Our girls all cheered us on as we tried to put up a massive 20 foot wide sign on posts that was to stand 6 feet above the stage. For a mental image - think about the statue of the americans soldiers raising the flag at Iwo Jima! The dance teams did their thing, pulled in more diamond awards and really did great - including Meghan who had a pretty big part in this huge production routine.

Take down was another thing altogether. We went around back and waited for them to be ready for us. It was beautiful outside, 15c, sunny... I told the guy next to me 'this is perfect biergarten weather!'. He said back 'there's one right over there, saw a few of our guys there already!'.

So not needing any more encouragement, we went for a quick pop and sat in the sun. Much better than trying to stay awake inside watching yet another group of suburban girls try to pull of a tough hip hop routine - wearing fancy scarves no less...

After the pack up, there was nothing left for me for the day. Emma and I headed back to the hotel to go swimming, something the other girls couldn't do - a sore point with many of them. They amused themselves though - and had fun just hangin out.

Day 3 - Almost done
One dance left to go. Unfortunately, it was 3rd from last on the day's sched - and wouldn't be until almost 6. We took as much time as humanly possible at the hotel before heading over for what would be a long day of waiting, a quick dance, then awards, then a lovely 3.5 hour drive back in the dark on that stupid highway.

Again, the dance was a huge Jazz routine with close to 40 kids on stage. It was REALLY GOOD. Meghan again had a pretty big part in it - right up front pulling off some big moves. The awards were then handed out, they got another diamond for the routine - but more importantly - that number received the 'best of show' for the entire weekend. Everyone was very happy with that - a very successful weekend for the Elite dancers.

A horribly painful 3.5 hour drive later in the dark and rain, and we were home. Meghan had racked up 2 emerald and 5 diamond awards, with a 1st in each - and I got a taste of what it was like to be a dance dad.

Meghan and I made a birdfeeder awhile ago out of a few things we had lying around.

What you'll need:

Step 1.

Untwist the coat hanger, use the pliers here if you're not superman with the hands. You don't have to straighten it, just get it apart.

Step 2.

Poke holes in the Peanut Butter jar. Positioning of these holes is the key... if it were laying on it's side - the hold should be just above halfway to the top, and just over halfway to the lid.

This allows it to stay upright - but allows for movement so the squirrels aren't able to stay on it.

Step 3.

Put the coat hanger through the two holes and then twist it back together so it looks like a normal coat hanger. (that's how you hang it!)

Step 4.

Cut hole in lid. Just big enough that birds can get in.

Step 5.

Poke hole in lid, just below opening - for the bamboo skewer. Something for the birdies to land on.

Step 6.

Fill with birdseed.

Step 7.

Nuke the bacon fat. Then pour it into jar with seeds. Give it a good shake.

Step 8.

Put the lid on.

Step 9.
Put a little tape on the hanger, on either side of the jar. Stops it from falling to one side or the other...

Step 10.

Hang it.

Now just a warning... I tried this at first without the bacon fat. The squirrels figured out that they couldn't stay on it, but could knock it over a bit, and spill some of the seeds out. That's why I went for the bacon fat... The bacon fat (not too much - don't want to weigh it down!) holds the seeds in - no spillage.

Here's how I found out that I needed to add the bacon fat...

And here's what it looks like in action! A birdfeeder... feeding birds!